A little theoretical tangent

Since January I have been “home” in Canada. While there, I have been part of a few significant happenings, and I wondered how I would connect them here in this blog. My original thinking was to start with something like “I chose the right year to be here in North America”, which got me pondering the choice of the word “right” and all the connotations of this statement. So, through the writing of this post, I've reworded that idea and have spewed a little bit of theory according to me to support that rewording, for your reading pleasure. The result is the following.

Fate and destiny are popular themes in literature. I talk about them sometimes in the classes I teach. Macbeth believing in the fate prophesied to him by the witches and then doing everything in his power to make sure it all comes true; unfortunate Oedipus who finally plucked his own eyes out for his attempts to avoid his fate and, thus, fulfilling it. And we all know what happened to those poor “star-crossed lovers”. While these are rather tragic examples, the message that one shouldn't attempt to control one's own fate is clear, and worth discussing within the context of art. Even more popular modern stories love to play with the idea of fate: Harry Potter's famous scar and his fate to be the young hero of the magic world and defeat his enemy, Voldemort, is just one relatively recent example. But what about believing in destiny for real?

I can see why it is such a tempting idea, one that in a way alieviates one from a certain level of responsibility. It was meant to be. There was a reason that it happened this way. It was fate. There was a sign. And, even worse, its all a part of the grand plan. But it seems to me that real life works a little differently than the imagined world of literature and entertainment.

My favourite word to throw into this mix is “coincidence”. Or, if you like, “chance”, or “toeval”. The idea that one event can lead to another and then cause another one. A chain reaction. Like atoms bumping off of one another, sending each other into another direction to bump off of whatever is there.

I won't use the word “random”, though, don't worry. I'm not that callous. But the idea that things happen for a reason, and that reason is because they were meant to happen, they were pre-determined by some unknown force, is a concept I'll save for theoretical discussion in the classroom.

I figured that as a result of my decision to be here this year instead of working in Amsterdam, I would “bump into” some interesting people and events. I won't say my coming home this year was “meant to be”, but its definitely been full of interesting and handy coincidental events; so as chance would have it, I can say that its definitely been a “good” year to do it. I've got a few examples why.

I've met some people along the way that I'd like to keep in touch with. One or two who I do keep in touch with and one that I'm getting to know quite well. All thanks to a coincidental “being in the right place at the right time.”

Being home in Calgary has allowed me to support my parents through various situations as they continue to transition between working life and retired life. I was there the past week to help my friend get through the death of her mother. I was there, in the same week, to travel to Victoria and witness my brother's marriage.

Add the element of destiny, and the fact that I was around for all of this could make these stories classic. Art. But as real life, its been luck, coincidence, good timing. That, and intelligent decision making and action by getting plane tickets and making arrangements to physically be where I needed/wanted to be. I am absolutely glad the way this year has been working out. Whether any of it was “meant to be”, though, I doubt.

The same friend's father died a few years ago and there was no way for me to get there to help her. My mother was hit by a car while I was living in Norway and it took a week until I was able to be with her. My father had heart surgery, and since that operation took place during summer holiday, I was able to be there; I did have to leave sooner than we would have liked, though, to return to my life. Was it “meant to be” that I was away for these things? Or a coincidental result of my circumstances living so far away?

Stories that contain fate and destiny have a beginning and an end. Real life rolls along in its time and space. In the end, the snow was good in the mountains this winter, and I was able to watch Canada win gold at home and feel the pride honking and shouting its exuberant way down the streets last Sunday afternoon. Chance, or fate? :)